Rabbi Shmuley Boteach
Rabbi and Writer
Several times a week I counsel couples in crisis. Underlying all their problems is the loss of desire. They love each other, but they no longer lust after each other. Their marriages are now built on the softer, more comfortable emotion of love rather than passionate, more explosive and nuclear bond of lust.
Why is lust disappearing? There are many reasons. First, we are such a physical and material generation that we don’t understand lust. So we denigrate it as something sleazy. Lust, we think, is something men feel when they look at porn. Lust is what a man feels for his secretary while love is what he feels for his wife. Lust is what a wife experiences for the male colleague at work with whom she flirts while love is what she feels when she spoons with her husband at night in bed…
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